


House Calls Not Included

by Terminallydepraved



Series: Works for Others [20]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Gen, chrollo is a hot mess, doctor leorio to the rescue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-06-24
Packaged: 2018-11-18 06:10:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11285295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Terminallydepraved/pseuds/Terminallydepraved
Summary: Leorio really isn't getting paid enough for this. Wait, is he getting paid at all?





	House Calls Not Included

**Author's Note:**

> this is a fic dedicated to Keat! i hope you feel better soon~

When Leorio decided to become a doctor, he had done so with the intent to help people. Lofty dreams of providing affordable care to people in need, of never letting a patient suffer like his friend had so many years ago. He had dedicated his life to a pursuit many would consider noble, but standing in the abandoned church, trussed up from his head down to his ankles, Leorio felt anything but noble. To be perfectly honest, he felt like an idiot for being the type to say “Of course!” when a pretty, sad looking stranger had come up to him asking if he were a doctor. But, Leorio was a sucker for a pretty girl and if this life had taught him anything, it was that suckers got what they deserved.

He just wasn’t quite sure what he had done to deserve being kidnapped by the infamous Phantom Troupe. 

“Come on, move!” the pretty woman from before grunted, her charm considerably less now that she had effectively caught him. She shoved at his back and made him hop along in front of her like an idiot, her light pink hair catching in the dim light of the candles lit around the abandoned space. “If you even think of trying anything, doctor or not, I’ll kill you before you have time to regret it.” 

A shiver ran down Leorio’s spine at her words. “You know, I liked you a lot more when you were batting your eyes at me,” he muttered, sweating from the effort of keeping himself moving and upright at the same time. 

Leorio earned another shove for his trouble, one that was hard enough to knock him off his feet and onto his knees. He grunted and glared back at the woman, but it wilted the moment he saw that he was effectively surrounded. The room was dark but he could just make out at least five figures seated around on various bits of rubble. Leorio swallowed and looked up at the pink haired woman. What on earth had she brought him here for?

“Machi,” a soft voice called out from the head of the room. “Who did you bring here?”

The woman, evidently Machi, took a few steps past Leorio and looked off into the darkness. “A doctor since you’re being an idiot,” she said, crossing her arms. 

“Machi, I told you I’m fine--”

“Boss, with all due respect,” another voice called out, one that came from another woman that Leorio could just barely make out in the dim light of the nearby candles, “please shut up and let the doctor look at you.”

“If you try to walk on that ankle again, we’ve all agreed that we’ll revolt,” a man’s voice said, deep and calm, a laugh just heard beneath his words. “Unless you’ve changed your mind on letting me carry you.” 

Leorio was suffering some form of whiplash, the type that he, as a doctor, knew there was no cure for. “God, Franklin,” the boss sighed, “please don’t joke about that.”

“Then it’s decided,” Machi said, swiping out her hand and severing the knots binding Leorio as easily as if they had been made of floss. “Get to it, doc. Fix up Chrollo and we won’t kill you.”

“Oh, well, so long as you won’t kill me,” Leorio grunted, rubbing life back into his wrists. “I guess I’ll just send my bill to one of you then? I don’t make house calls so don’t be surprised if I charge you out the ass for this.” He pushed himself off the ground and made in the direction Machi pointed, traversing the dark, uneven floor carefully. If he made it through this experience without being killed or infected by deadly disease from the crumbling ruin, he would be more than surprised. Leorio would be downright stupefied. 

“So I’m guessing you’re the patient?” Leorio said once he had come to the head of the room. The leader of the Phantom Troupe sat on a makeshift bed of pilfered sheets and an old mattress, his right leg propped up on a padded mass that looked to be part of a ruined pew. Chrollo was sans his coat and boots, his hair ungelled and his shirt rumbled. All in all, he looked a bit of a mess, deep circles under his eyes and a sheen of sweat on his face that told Leorio he was in considerable pain. 

“I’m sorry,” the leader said, his voice smooth and soft in the quiet darkness. He looked young, far younger than Leorio would have expected him to look. “This is so embarrassing. I told them not to worry about it.”

One look at Chrollo’s broken, swollen ankle told Leorio that they definitely were right to worry. “Well, I’m here now so I might as well take a look,” he murmured, kneeling down to gently tug at Chrollo’s pant leg. “When did this happen and how? Have you had an x ray?”

Chrollo steadily avoided his eye, a tight smile on his face as he did so. “Ah, well, you’re the first to look at it besides my friends,” he admitted, cheeks paling when Leorio was forced to rip his pants to get it up over the swollen part of his ankle. He sucked in air and closed his eyes, and Leorio swallowed nervously when the troupe members began to fidget and glower. “I-It happened about two weeks ago,” Chrollo said, only stumbling a little from the pain. “I fumbled a landing and I’m afraid my ankle took the brunt of it.”

It certainly had. Leorio furrowed his brow and felt gently along the swollen skin. “Can I get some more light in here?” he barked, looking over his shoulder at one of the spiders, some tall blond man in a tracksuit. The man jumped a little and glared, but Leorio was here to help so these guys could damn well help out too. “Yeah, I’m talking to you, blondie. You’ve gotta have more around here than just half-burnt candles and gothic ambiance.” 

Chrollo let out a small laugh and it dissolved the worst of the tension. “It’s alright, Phinks,” the boss said, leaning back onto his hands a little. “If you went to the trouble of bringing a doctor you might as well assist him however you can.” 

“Fine, boss,” Phinks grunted, stalking forward as he fished inside his pocket for a cellphone. Leorio rolled his eyes. “Is this enough?” he asked, turning on the flashlight app and hovering it over Chrollo’s ankle. It wasn’t ideal but it was better than before, that was for sure. 

“I’ll make do,” Leorio murmured, taking in the bruising. “It’s amazing the lot of you don’t have tetanus from hanging out places like these. I swear, you’re a doctor’s worst nightmare.” There was no sign of the bone penetrating the skin though, and for that Leorio was thankful. He had a lot of things in his bag, but nothing that could help him with that level of injury. He let out a relieved sigh, not missing how the gathered troupe members leaned closer at the sound. “It’s definitely broken, but it looks like a closed fracture.”

“Is that bad?” Phinks asked, looming over him. 

Leorio frowned and looked up at him, pointedly pushing the man’s phone back to where he needed it to be. “It’s not as bad as it could be,” he told him, cupping Chrollo’s ankle carefully. Looking at the boss, he softened his expression, using the voice he always used on his patients. “I need to see where the break is to figure out what sort we’re dealing with. I’ll be prodding and squeezing a little, so I need you to tell me where the pain is centralized so I know how to proceed. Think you can do that?”

Chrollo nodded, sweat beading his forehead, his longish hair sticking to his cheeks. Phinks rested a hand on his shoulder. It earned Phinks a tight smile. “Do what you have to do, doctor,” he said, closing his eyes. “I’ll do my best.”

Well, at least Chrollo was a model patient despite his apparent lack of common sense when it came to how to handle an injury. Leorio lowered his head and squeezed just above the ankle, doing his best to feel past the hot, swollen skin for the bone below. Chrollo let out a choked grunt but didn’t flinch or fidget. “How is the pain here?” Leorio asked, glancing up at Chrollo. 

Chrollo just shook his head, eyes closed tightly. Leorio hummed, moving an inch lower to try again. 

It was when Chrollo let out a yelp of pain, grabbing at Phinks’s hand, that Leorio found the fracture. It was just below his anklebone and slightly off center, so much so that Leorio could practically imagine the angle in which Chrollo fell. “Ah,” he said, letting off the pressure and smiling at Chrollo reassuringly. “There it is. You did well. I think I can help with this. I mean, I’d still highly suggest you go to an actual hospital to get a proper x ray done,” Leorio said, catching the look on Phinks’s face, “but I’m assuming that’s not going to happen so I’ll do what I can to get this fixed up enough to heal properly.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Chrollo said, his grip on Phinks the only thing keeping him upright. 

“Oi!” Leorio called out to one of the shadows behind him. “Will one of you fetch me my bag?” There was a flutter and a shuffle, someone getting up off their seat. In the time it took to blink, a short, masked figure was at his side, briefcase held out to him with a muted glare. “Thank you,” Leorio said, taking it carefully.

“Do anything we not like,” the short man said, his voice low and accented, “and I kill you where you stand.”

“Feitan, please,” Chrollo sighed. “Let the man work.”

“And while you’re at it,” Leorio added on, the briefcase opened at his side. “Could one of you get me some water? I’ve got plaster of paris but it needs to be mixed.” He hoped he had enough gauze to do the job. Traveling around with Killua and Gon especially tended to deplete his supply faster than he had ever thought possible. 

Chrollo nodded and Feitan disappeared in a flash, reappearing maybe a minute later with a gallon of water in an old, obviously scavenged milk jug. “It clean,” he said defensively when he caught Leorio assessing it, and he shoved it at the doctor’s chest, nearly dropping it in his lap when he failed to take it immediately. 

“Thanks, I guess,” Leorio murmured, pouring a measure of water into the plaster bag since he had no better way to mix it. It would be a little lumpy, maybe a bit messy, but it would set up all the same. The important thing was to get the ankle supported. “Have you ever broken a bone before? Do you know how this works?”

Chrollo shrugged, avoiding his eye. “Haven’t we all?” he said, and Leorio didn’t quite know how to take that. “How long will I need to wear this?”

“Hard to say,” Leorio admitted, wrapping the ankle first with what he had to function as padding. He would need to work quickly with the room so warm, the water nowhere even remotely resembling cold. “It all depends on how fast you usually heal. I have a friend who healed a broken arm faster than I ever thought humanly possible. I’d say take it easy and use crutches for at least a few weeks,” he advised, reaching for the gauze and dipping it in the plaster mixture. “The cast can probably come off once you can bear your full weight on it without discomfort.  _ Don’t  _ push it before it’s healed.”

“We’ll make sure he doesn’t,” Machi called out behind him, her voice giving the impression that they were used to forcing Chrollo to take it easy when he was injured. Chrollo pouted but it did no good. Phinks patted Chrollo on the shoulder, showing him he was easily outnumbered in this. 

Leorio worked while they all bickered, wrapping the ankle carefully and quickly, giving it the support it needed to heal properly. It really could have been a lot worse. Given all that Leorio had seen and all he assumed these guys had been through, it was surprising that Chrollo hadn’t done something a lot more severe than break it. Small mercies, he figured. Even bad guys had to have good luck sometimes. 

“And I think that about does it. You were a model patient, I gotta say.” Except for, you know, trying to walk on a damn broken ankle instead of seeking medical attention. Cleaning his hands off with the last of the water, Leorio stood up, his knees creaking. “Sorry I don’t have any lollipops for you,” he joked, aching for a drink. “The kids I hang out with have insane sweet tooths.” 

Chrollo laughed at that. He looked better already, his cheeks showing some color now, his cold sweat gone. He combed back his bangs and looked at Leorio with a smile. “That’s a shame, I’m pretty fond of lollipops myself.” 

“I’ll buy you a pack later, boss,” Phinks offered, patting his boss on the back as he pocketed his phone. “How long will it take for that stuff to dry?”

Leorio sighed, cracking his back. “Oh, probably a half hour, maybe forty five minutes at most,” he said, wondering how the hell he was going to get home. “I’ve got a marker if you guys want to sign it.”

It was almost funny how every eye turned to Chrollo for permission, the troupe members nearly vibrating with excitement at the thought. Chrollo laughed again and nodded, and in the blink of an eye, the spiders were at his side, wrestling for the spot closest to his ankle. 

“Doc,” Feitan grunted, appearing at Leorio’s side. “Give me the marker.”

“No fair!” another blond man cried, running over to shove at Feitan. “Give me it first!”

“I’ve got it!” the dark-haired girl crowed, and Leorio looked down to find her digging through his suitcase messily. She held it to her chest and darted over to Chrollo, looking victorious. “I get to sign first!”

“Hey!” Leorio shouted, nearly falling on his ass as Feitan tore past him to tackle the girl. “I said let it dry first!”

But they were hardly listening to him now. Staring at them all crowding around their boss, arguing and fighting over the single marker, Leorio had to stifle a laugh. As far as house calls went, this one wasn’t as terrible as it could have been. Of course, that all might change the moment they looked at his bill. They could afford it, he thought, packing up his scattered suitcase. They could afford anything if it meant their boss was safe and sound. 

**Author's Note:**

> that was a lot of fun, i miss doing short stuff like this. check me out on tumblr (terminallydepraved) if you like my work and would like to see more! until next time~


End file.
